Hey guys, I want to write a mini series on friendships and basically this is the relationship we have with other people. So it could be family, classmates, co-workers,lovers, neighbors even ourselves. Don’t ask why family. I know we all have relatives we are not close to. As much as blood is thicker it’s not enough and we need to build a friendship with our relatives too.
The basic foundation of any relationship is trust. It starts as far back as conception. God trusts a woman to birth a child. The child is taken care of by the parents or guardian. The child grows trusting the parents and the teachers. Then the child starts forming friendships with classmates and the kids he/she plays with. Some of these relationships strengthen over time. The kid grows also learning to trust themselves.
Trust takes forever to build and is destroyed in a matter of seconds. It’s easily broken and thus we restrain from offering others our trust. We don’t want our trust broken and we don’t want to be too naive to give it easily.
Trust is earned. Without it no meaningful relationship is built. That is why we should be careful about the friends we choose. You don’t have to have hundreds of friends. You can have many acquaintances but don’t bare yourself naked onto everyone you meet. Trust is precious. The same trust doesn’t mean that you have to tell anyone everything when you don’t want to.
I have done this mistake before. I thought that because someone says they trust me, they should be able to open up about anything and everything and I used to get angry if they don’t. That is wrong so wrong. Yes someone could trust you and still want to do things by themselves or solve the issues by themselves. You also need to trust that they are doing what they feel is right for both of you.
“The beauty in friendships is to understand and to be understood”
It is a two way street. Same as respect. Don’t let it be one sided. Don’t be unsure about where you stand in someone’s life and don’t exaggerate your position in someone’s life. You’ll easily know this if you look at the effort. If you are the one doing all the work to keep the friendship going. It is one sided. If you cannot go to someone for help and yet they always come to you. Be clear with your boundaries but do not let your walls up high and block all good relationships that could help you grow.
Be trustworthy. You can’t be devious and expect you will be trusted. Put out the energy you want to attract.
If you have any topics you want me to discuss on friendships feel free to leave a comment or DM me. Let’s share.