Ever been okay and doing great then one thing just one trigger and suddenly you are in roller coaster of emotions .
Feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, broken, sad and all those other negative emotions you feel and suddenly the whole world seems to be crushing on you.
It’s in the middle of the night, you are crying so hard that you have to cover your mouth to avoid being loud.
Well I certainly have, some you can’t relate but those who do have those relapses you know how bad they are. How draining they are and sometimes you think you will never be fine or you will not get through it. Your problems suddenly feel larger than you.
It is okay to not be okay and you shouldn’t beat yourself about it. Crying it out sort of lets the emotions out. I certainly feel better after crying. A thing I learnt about myself is that if I bottle things up. It will get toxic for me and the people around me.
You go through things in life difficult things and they sort of harden you and you don’t want to experience that kind of pain again. You suddenly feel the need to stop being vulnerable and build a wall up around your heart. Have your guard up all the time. That is understandable but we at the same time could be blocking the right people from our live and boy this leaves me confused.
The damage done after a heartbreak or loosing someone you love, being fired from a job, business failing, divorces and separation. That damage is real.
People are going about their daily lives with heavy hearts and bitterness. I know at some point I did. My best friend kept on telling “you are becoming mean these days” and I got defensive . I told her no I just don’t take crap these days but she had a point and deep in my heart I knew it.
I knew that slowly I was becoming what I wasn’t. Yes I don’t take crap but is there a nicer to do that and not hurt people’s feelings? That is what I asked myself. I felt if I impacted the pain I felt on others it will help but it didn’t. I just felt worse for being mean to a possibly a good person that I didn’t take time to know. That phrase “hurt people hurt people” couldn’t be more true. If someone if being mean or rude huge chance they are projecting their insecurities onto you and that is their problem. They have an issue they have not dealt with and they will try and make you feel bad about yourself.
People need to understand that you need to heal from your past experiences . Fill your own cup first with content, happiness and purpose . Now you can pour into another person’s cup and fill their lives with the same happiness. Pouring from an empty cup is toxic, you are draining yourself of the little energy you have, you’ll be constantly unhappy and easily irritated and it will take a toll on the people around you.
Yes everyone has baggage but how well are you handling your baggage. If not so we’ll talk to a friend, if it is serious get a professional. We really need to step up and be there for others and know the role of people in our lives. The hangout friends, the business friends, the study partners ,the ones who we share everything with, the people we just happen to know who come in handy one day.
Don’t over rank yourself in someone’s life. I know we’ve all been through this and ended up dissappointed. See where you stand with your friends, with the people in your contact list. If they are helpful to you and if you are helpful to them.
You guys, most of us complain they don’t check up on me so I won’t check up on them. First of all both of you are thinking the same that is probably why no one is texting first. But why are we prideful in friendships. Love should be genuine and if you are playing the I texted last game…grow up and talk it out. If you honestly feel like you have tried but it has been in vain move on with your life.
We know so many people and can’t keep in touch with all of them but the beauty of friendship is being able to pick it up right where you left it. With no drama and bad blood. I for one cannot handle Instagram , Snapchat , Twitter and Pinterest at the same time. I end up forgetting one or the other. Usually it’s Snapchat most of the time😂(Snapchat chews on bundles like a hungry bear on prey from hibernating and I’m not always on WiFi) that was besides the point. As I was saying, if you feel you’ve gone too long call them, if they are ignoring you leave it. People have lives outside of your friendship or blood relation or relationship. Grow up and deal with it. Stop posting things like” I’m cutting off those who don’t check up on me, if you still see my status after tonight you are lucky”. I mean, what! These kind of statements should have been left in 2018.
Anyways so my point is. Self evaluate yourself in relation to you, your family, your friends, your workmates, your relationship, your classmates, neighbors. Check yourself for unhealed wound and injured scars. Be at a good place with yourself. You’ll see the effect you have on people around you. Working on yourself is not easy but no one will do it for you.
Finally, I love watching “The Real” and Jeannie Mai said something that I hadn’t ever thought of but it stuck with me. “You are the love of your life” because you are literally stuck with you forever, you want to do good for yourself ,you want to love yourself more every minute, you want to make yourself proud, you hate it when you disappoint yourself. You will literally never leave yourself and say I’m done with you . Your soul is intertwined with your body. Quiet the noise and listen to yourself more often. To the loving voice inside of you that wants the best for you.
Oh and I want to read your suggestions on how to handle situations like breakups. What do you do after a nasty break up. Cause relationships hardly work as they used to in our parents time. Please leave a comment.
Thanks for reading.
Sorry I slacked on posting ❤️
Lots of love:)